1.
YOU’VE “UNCOUPLED.”
Couples whose marriages are over, or nearly over, have usually uncoupled, or
disconnected from each other.If you’re no longer spending any time together, if
one or both of you is spending all your time at work, with friends, online—and
if feels like a relief not to be with each other—it’s a sign that you’ve already
disengaged from the Marriage or Relationship.
2. ONE
SPOUSE REFUSES TO TRY. There
are a lot of damaging, seemingly insurmountable problems that some marriages
encounter and rebound from, such as infidelity, the loss of a close family member
and a long sexual drought but it even worst if one spouse repeatedly brings up
an issue, and the other spouse refuses to go along, the marriage is in trouble.
“One partner can’t do all the trying on his or her own.
3.
THERE’S A LACK OF RESPECT IN THE RELATIONSHIP. One of the most important
aspects of a healthy marriage is mutual respect, When that’is gone—when one
partner consistently feels dismissed, rejected and condescended to (and the
other partner doesn’t see it or refuses to talk through it), you’re in a bad
place. “Marriages that reach this place are toxic
4.
YOU’RE NO LONGER A TEAM.
I may sound footballing, In healthily humming-along marriages, both partners
work as a team on everything from parenting to running the household to
supporting each other in career and personal ambitions. “If you’ve both started
moving in completely separate orbits, or if you’re not working together on
day-to-day issues, it’s a sign of serious trouble,”
5. AN
UNFAITHFUL SPOUSE KEEPS AN EX-LOVER AS A FRIEND. Infidelity is an enormous
hurdle for a marriage to overcome, but just ending the affair is not enough,For
a marriage to fully get past one spouse’s adultery, the unfaithful half of the
couple cannot maintain a “friendship” with the former lover. No matter what he or
she says about the innocence of such a relationship, “nothing good can come out
of it.
6. NO
COMPROMISING IN TERMS OF WANTS AND NEEDS. A major part of marriage involves
trying to fulfill your partner’s needs while also making sure your own needs
are met. It’s a lifelong dance, a give and take, and it requires constant
communication. But if your partner continually refuses to listen to what you
need (time, affection, sex/physical contact, help with children or chores), or
refuses to share his own needs, you’re not in a good place,
.
7. ONE
SPOUSE IS A SERIAL CHEATER.
“Some individuals are just not cut out
for marriage; they are unable to remain monogamous, even if they seemed to have
wanted to get married.What’s worse, they manage to put the blame for their
philandering and untrustworthiness on their patners, usually for being too
jealous or controlling or not meeting certain particular needs.They may
appologise ones caught but to stop is not a thing of the serial cheater. That’s
a problem you can’t fix, and likely spells the end of your marriage.
8. YOU
DISAGREE ABOUT WHETHER TO HAVE CHILDREN OR NOT. There are many areas of
compromise in a marriage, such as who is responsible for dealing with the
finances, where you should spend the holidays, how to handle family issues and
so on. But if one of you is absolutely sure you want a child and the other
categorically refuses, you’re in trouble. “If someone’s close to either side of
the will-we-or-won’t-we-have-children fence, you can work through it. But if
not, and having a child is a life goal of yours, you may be looking at the end
of your marriage,”
9. YOU
NO LONGER COMMUNICATE WITH EACH OTHER. No
problem in a marriage can be solved without open, honest communication. If
you’ve reached a point where all you ever talk about is mundane things, like
who needs to buy milk, you’re in trouble, “Lack of personal, intimate exchange
in a marriage is a very bad sign, especially if you are talking to others.”
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